Oh boy! When I saw the Spin Cycle was about guilt I just had to laugh. I almost feel guilty about it - but not really.
Let's just say that I know Guilt. I know it very well. I grew up with Guilt as a very familiar part of my life. You see, I'm a full blooded Italian and my mother is the absolute best at dishing out heaping plates of guilt.
When I was little I remember my sister often telling me "pack your bags, Leslie. We're going on a guilt trip!" And they were some crazy trips I tell you what!
When my mom would get pissed about something she would bust out with her "silent treatments". For a little kid I don't think there is anything worse than when your own mom won't speak to you. I remember just feeling like total shit when I had done something that disappointed her. God, the guilt was enough to kill me sometimes.
That's why I decided that I would never make my own kids or my husband suffer through the "silent treatment". Whenever I'm angry or disappointed, they know it. And I try to avoid heaping on the guilt in the form of long agonizing lectures about how hard I slave over a hot stove, or at work, or at cleaning the house, or how much I sacrifice to provide this of that for them etc. etc. - it doesn't do any one any good.
So with all that said you would think that I now live a pretty guilt-free life, right? Well, not so much. I still feel guilty about a lot of things I think most moms feel guilty about.
Guilty for working outside of the home.
Guilty for not spending enough time with my kids.
Guilty for not enjoying every single second I do spend with my kids.
Guilty for going out once a month for my book club meeting.
Guilty about not spending enough time with my husband.
Guilty when I go off my "diet"
Guilty when I forget to call a good friend on their birthday.
Guilty when I take time for myself.
Guilty when I don't include a vegetable in every meal.
Guilty, guilty, guilty!
I think somewhere in the Spin, Jen even mentioned "regret". I have done things in my life that I really regret. I'm not an angel that's for sure. But I'm not a complete dumb-ass either so I'm definitely not going to talk about any of the things I've done that I regret because, well, that would be just plain bad. I want you guys to like me after all. Okay - none of it's THAT bad - but still. :)
So, there you have it. Lots and lots of guilt - a fair amount of regret - but overall nothing that keeps me awake at night. I think that's pretty good - don't you?