This morning Captain Crazy came into our room as usual for his morning "snuggle time" with me. I swear the kid is addicted to snuggling - he just LOVES, LOVES, LOVES it and I love it too. I know all too well that eventually he'll outgrow his desire to snuggle with me and then I'll be lucky to get a high five in passing from him. So, like I was saying, I love snuggling with him too. We burrow under the covers and I wrap my arms around him and we either nod off to sleep again or we talk about our day ahead.
This morning I was telling Captain Crazy that I would miss him while I was at work today, but that I would be holding him in my heart all day until I saw him again. He looked at me with his big, beautiful brown eyes and asked "But Mommy, how can I get in your heart? There's no door to open to get in." My heart melted a little and I just told him that my heart doesn't need a door because it's was always open and that it was always very full because he and his brother are always in it, filling it up. This explanation must have satisfied him because he smiled and promptly moved on to more pressing issues like the morning's breakfast menu.
Now I know my kids are too young right now to fully grasp the depth of love I have for them -sometimes it still surprises me. But I do hope that some day they'll understand. I hope that some day they'll understand why I kiss them so much, why I tell them I love them so often, why my husband and I have gladly sacrificed so much for them, why we work so hard to keep them safe and healthy and why, if anything ever happened to them, our reasons for living would be gone. They are little now, but I hope that when they're grown, they realize how much we love them and that they go on, long after we're gone, holding us in their hearts too.